Cheap thrills.

Cheap, cheap, cheap. Did you miss that? Here I’ll say it again: CHEAP!

Bashar is what Bashar does. As many of us guessed at the start of this rather downhill ride Bashar is indeed a chichora gunda who’ll stoop to whatever level to get what he wants. My question though is does he really want Rudaba or is it just a matter of a game? Is he in it just to “delete” Buland from their conversation? Is he really in love with her? If yes, yeh kaisi mohabbat hai yaar?

In a quick flick of an eyelash Rudaba welcomes back Adil Bhai and simultaneously bids Buland adieu via Ramzan Chacha of course.

Bechari Rudaba. Bashar ka khauf has finally started to sink in on this pretty girl.

If Adhura Milan is like Bashar Momin, then, Bashar Momin is like the worst Balaji Productions soap opera. Theatrics. Hysterics. Melodrama. Of course, the saving grace here is that the camera doesn’t jump in quick jerks with some heightened music thrown in to turn up the emotional quotient a few notches!

If I was a gora with no knowledge of Pakistani dramas I would easily think this is some trashy Balaji-inspired serial.

But I’m not, even though I see many similarities with our cinematic cousins across the Bahr-al-‘Arab, I can say without doubt that Bashar Momin is definitely homegrown. It is Pakistani through and through and comes with Pakistani good, Pakistani bad, and Pakistani ugly. Our ugly is that we blindly want to copy what we see in India, Turkey, or the West, our bad is that we don’t have the common sense to see the difference, but our good is that we have such a strong sense of narrative, of the importance of (a logical) story, which often times saves our disasters from being gigantic. Case in point, Bashar Momin.

This has been a up and down ride. I hate it but I watch it. I like it but I can’t stand it. Confused much anyone? And I know I’m not the only one.

Seeing Rudaba run down those stairs and hug a figure that we obviously couldn’t see (HELLO?! What’re the odds that’s NOT Buland?) was a tribute to Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s chandelier-doused work. Those words, that confession and, oh wait, what is it that I hear: “I love you, Buland.” Alas Rudaba too little, too late.

Buland’s up, up, up and away leaving our damsel in the hands of a darinda, haivan, shaitan!

Although the story was slow, in fact, dragged at a snail’s pace what I liked were the scenes between Bashar and Rudaba. Well acted and well-scripted.

Bashar ko apni ungleeyon par loogon ko nachana aata hai.

Accha, to aab aap Rudaba ko nachanay ki baat bhi kar gaye, Bashar Bhai. Did I say this before: CHEAP!

Come morning and we are still stuck on convincing Rudaba (she herself more so than us!) that Mr. Two-ex-girlfriends is gone. Again, the scene especially the framing on the landing was well executed (no, one can compete with the staircase from BILU!). I actually liked that A&B finally decided to use natural lighting along with their trademark angelic white waves! Rudaba’s face as it caught the first hints of sunlight: beautiful!

With Adil back and Rudaba distraught is Bashar finally on a winning streak?

No, no, no we’re yet to see Sahira in action. I love how Sahira says: “You should have offered an explanation”, since when do men listen to explanations especially when they’re angry, Sahira? (If desi dramas are to be believed!) Aur bohtan it seems has become the de facto way to malign a woman in our dramas. Bohtan, bohtan, bohtan.

Truth be told Rudaba you’re better off without Buland. Can you imagine being married to a man who’d threaten to leave you for no fault of yours? Another piece of advice: SPEAK UP!

I’m wondering if Buland will be back. Gone so soon? Ab kya?

Happy reading,

RB (Tweet me!)

P.S. Bashar Bhai swimming bhi kartay hain. Oh my! Someone’s paying attention to what a “real man” is supposed to be. Now if only there was a shark or better yet a snake.