Before reading about Ashar (Fawwad Khan) in Humsafar, consider the following characters and situations.
In “Kaisa Hai Yeh Jahan”, a soap aired on ARY a few years ago, the character of Humayun Saeed is made to believe by his mothers and sisters that his wife (played by Sadia Imam) is having an affair with his younger brother. Humayun is enraged and after one too many innocent incidents which make the wife seem like a culprit, he turns her out of the house.
In “Meri Zaat Zarra-e-Benishan”, a drama serial aired on Geo TV, the mother in law manages to manipulate the situation in front of her son to “prove” that his wife is having an affair with her cousin. The result? There is a divorce on the spot.
In “Bahu Rani”, another soap on ARY, the mother in law conspires with her neice, who photoshops images of her daughter in law with another man. The husband, played by Fahad Mustafa, does not even bother to ask his wife for an explanation and turns her out of the house.
(All three of the above were love marriages, by the way.)
I can go on and on. The point is, in every single drama, you find out that the easiest way to divide a couple is to cast doubt on the wife’s character. Why? Surely, there are other ways to make a wife look bad. You know, blaming her for stealing the great-gandmother’s jewellery or trying to poison the great-great-grandfather through her atrocious cooking. There are literally ten thousand ways to go about this.
Why does the “doubtful character” blame work like clockwork? Why didn’t any of the husbands in the above dramas at least try and figure out what was going on? Why did they so blindly trust their mothers in ALL three cases? Why didn’t they give their wives a chance to explain themselves?
Is the bond of (spousal) love this fragile? You bet it is, if it cannot stand the test of this ‘doubtful character’ blame game!
Hence, you see Ashar, a foreign-qualified, broad-minded character, distancing himself from his wife. It is, unfortunately, again the mother and her family, who are making it seem as if Khirad is inclined towards Khizr. The way the situations and the dialogues are being manufactured, any sane husband would wonder what was going on. But would a sane husband retreat into silence instead of talking it out?
Yes, unfortunately most husbands would do that – and certainly more out of outrage than sanity. And hence, it is safe to say that Ashar’s character is truly a real-life one – he is insecure about the age difference between him and Khirad; he is definitely afraid of losing Khirad and yet, he cannot bring himself to talk about this because he feels discussing these feelings would only make him seem weak and vulnerable.
Will Ashar ever realize his mistakes or own them? Will he ever communicate his feelings and his emotions? Find that out in the following weeks.
On a concluding note, this drama serial has beautifully portrayed the importance of communication in marriage and one can sincerely hope all couples and couples-to-be learn some vital lessons from it. But these will come soon in another post.
Your comments are most welcome.
Written by HA aka Drama Buff
PS: Do note that I have said Ashar’s characterization is spot on. I haven’t written that the way he is behaving or any of the husbands in the aforementioned dramas have behaved is right or logical!
